Relationship experience


After being through a number of relationships (legitimate and illigitimate) I can only say one thing: I suck at it.

In the first place, I never was aware of what really, REALLY, constituted a relationship. All I knew was that liking each other enough was the basis to be together. I never knew about things like quality time, consideration, responsibility, sacrifice, and things like that. I kept a relationship mostly because I was unaware that I was selfish. I kept relationships because of what it did for me or how good it made me feel. That and being attracted to the person.

Sure, there were some that I had out of rebellion or for refuge, but the bottom line was, it made me feel good.

And I had no idea that these things were complicated.

Now I am truly just content with friendship.


Being in a relationship for me would mean an added responsibility, a new extension in my life. A new adjustment. You can't just go and take a girl and turn her into your girlfriend. If there's one thing I've learned it's that the whole setup must work. No, you don't recieve it as an all-in-one-package. There's always the part where you have to work on it, nurture and nourish it. You have to undergo streamlining and trial-and-error stages.

Oh, and you have to do all that while being spontaneous.

It's never an automatic thing. Being careless here would most likely spell disaster for both parties. I've known from friends, and experiences, that impulses are a very dangerous thing. You get into trouble faster than you can spell it. The initial thrill is all, the rest is... well, a friggin' load.

This is why I believe in friendship.

Friendship is all the good stuff without the bull. You can be totally honest (okay not totally, maybe almost totally) with each other and wouldn't have to hide all your flaws and dirty issues and still be friends at the end of the day. You are free to be who you are. The only downside is that you don't get the benefits (but sometimes you get lucky and... hehehe). Sure, you have fights and misunderstandings. But these are easier to deal with and resolve if you're friends. Why? Because the ego level is lower and much tolerable between friends.

Being in a relationship does not automatically mean that you're friends. More often than not, complications occur and complexities develop because of a lack of friendship.

So what I say is let's just all be friends. For now.